Follow me into the Dark.

My name is Benjamin Meredith. Valifian is my main screen name used in various video games. This is my blog... obviously. As far as a description of me, I'm a 21 year old, 5' 11", white, not giving my weight because I hate it. I'm a feminist, and an ally. Politically liberal. If you couldnt guess that from the feminist and ally part. American. I do post some political stuff, but mostly just things I enjoy and find funny. Though be warned my tastes are generally quite dark and the things I find amusing aren't necessarily any less disturbing for the sake of that. Maybe a little punk. A little emo. A little metal. Maybe even more than a little country. This is my personality still, not my taste in music. That runs mainly to alternative rock with a mix or other various things mixed in. Classic rock, tribal beats, especially celtic, a small amount of country and rap, metal etc.

I'm an environmentalist, and lover of nature. My ambition is to be a geologist, though I don't know if I can anymore.

I have been alone for a long time now. If you think I'm hitting on you, don't be offended because I'm not. I don't want you or anyone else. I'm just being nice. I make an effort to be nice. But I also don't lie. I find it a waste of time. If I tell you something than I believe it's true.

I’m so ready to die. It’s all i think about anymore. Every day, every night. I’ll never be anything but miserable as long as I’m here.


My little slut knows exactly how to make me explode.



FACT OF THE DAY:  zebras’ stripes are not always black and white.  sometimes they are black and orange


this is a giraffe

(via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

For the first 18 years of my life I never had a friend. My on and off girlfriend of 3 years cheated on me dozens of times, and I was hard to the world. After my first semester of college, and just ending the very abusive relationship I had been in, I started to open up. I started letting myself trust people… An odd reaction, isn’t it, to become more trusting after being so abused? I guess I thought the worst was over. But I was wrong. I was more vulnerable than I’d ever let myself become, I was so desperate to be happy, to finally have friends like everyone around me. Time after time I’ve trusted, I’ve believed things I know aren’t true, just because someone I loved told me them. Someone I wanted to love me back. I believed when they said they were my friend. When they promised they weren’t just using me. Then, every time, something happens. Im dropped. Gone. They get a boyfriend, or smooth things up with the one they have, or they move or sometimes I guess they just get bored of me, and suddenly being friends with me doesn’t matter anymore. Suddenly we go from talking every day to not at all, over night. I believed this time too. You said it was different this time. I believed you. I stayed alive for you. I loved you. Now im trash, same as I always was, same as I always will be. Why should I stay now?

I dont even enjoy sex anymore.

I don’t feel anything. Just going through the motions, no desire anymore. I can’t love anymore, and sex without love is just turning wine into sweat. I’ve become so numb…

(Source: ralndrops, via tthemthangs)

(Source: sunlitwaterscape, via foxylizzy64)

Fixed. theme by Andrew McCarthy